March Musings: A Personal Reflection on Life's Ups and Downs

Debra Coleman [00:00:10]:
Well, hello, you, and welcome back to another mini cast episode of Have a Seat, conversations with women in the workplace podcast. I am your host, Deb Coleman. Hi. Hello. At the time of this recording, it is the March or getting towards the March. And I hope that wherever you reside that you are starting to see signs of your next season. Whatever that is for you, whatever wherever you hail from in this big beautiful world, I hope that winter or whatever season you're currently in is starting to let loose a little bit, and you're starting to see a change. Because I think this is kind of the time of year, at least for those of us in the Northern Hemisphere, where spring is upon us.

Debra Coleman [00:00:57]:
And there's and it's a new season. And it's a new season. And I think that also this time of year, you know, 2025 or a new year has officially kind of got its its its the engine is running. Right? Where the car is turned on and we're kinda backing it down the driveway, and we're starting to head head into the great unknown. Like, the year has started. It's not baby fresh, but yet it's also kinda getting there. You know, we're kinda starting to see some direction maybe. So welcome.

Debra Coleman [00:01:30]:
Welcome to another mini cast for those of you who may not know. Yes, I am primarily an interview style podcast, but every once in a while, I will steal the mic from my amazing guests, and I will do just this. I will have a conversation just you and me. I like to do that every now and then. I call them mini casts or as they're more commonly known as solo episodes, and this is one of those. So you know what, friend? I I honestly don't have an agenda for this for this for this show. I know. Right? Typical Deb.

Debra Coleman [00:02:02]:
I know. I can feel you rolling your eyes. Bear with me. I'm calling this in my head. This episode is March Musings, and it's the March. And I feel like so much has happened in my life, like, from the last of 2024 as we headed into 2025 so much so much. It's been a complete roller coaster. And if any of you are familiar with that movie parenthood, way back, like, the older parenthood, not any remakes or anything like that, but it is really good.

Debra Coleman [00:02:35]:
It's with Steve Martin, and Mary Steenburgen, I think, is a mom. And it's so good. And, anyway, the in one scene, the grandmother, I think, is talking to one of the characters, and she describes life as a roller coaster. And it just goes up and down and up and down and all you can do really is just buckle that seat belt and hold on and enjoy either enjoy the view or scream your head off like there's just really only two options right at that point. You know, a sidebar, it has been years since I've been on roller coaster. Honestly, that I just I gotta get on one. It's been a long time. So, anyway, just March musings.

Debra Coleman [00:03:15]:
I just wanted to share with you because, also, you know what? Life is messy. It's not perfect. I am not a fan of the perfection that people tend to put out in the world, whatever platform they use, whatever, you know, Insta, Facebook, TikTok, whatever it is, whether it's a podcast or a YouTube video or a blog or whatever. I'm not a fan of everything is perfect. Our everything is, like, every we know everything is everything is awesome. Like, from that Lego movie, you know, I love that song. Sometimes it is. You know what? Sometimes life is beautiful.

Debra Coleman [00:03:49]:
Sometimes the in this it's a particular season and you know what? Things are going well and you are in a good place. Your family and loved ones are too. And you're just in a place of of gratitude. And I I absolutely believe in that. But sometimes life isn't. Sometimes it's the exact opposite, and it can be a little ugly and a little messy. And I'm here to kind of talk about that a little bit, because I you know, I'm I'm a huge fan of being transparent and sharing with you guys anything good, bad, or indifferent. That's just the kind of podcaster I am.

Debra Coleman [00:04:21]:
This podcast by any means is not perfect. It is not polished, and that's okay because I'm not perfect, and I'm not polished. So I that's that's just sort of the vibe I have. So this week, I just wanted to share with you just some things that have been going on with me lately professionally, and a little bit personally. But, so I'll just get right to it because time is short, and I try to make these mini cash short. But overall, just keep in mind that I'm trying to my vibe is conversational, and I'm not telling you anything that I wouldn't share with you should I come into your hometown and say, hey, you. I'm here for, like, a weekend. You wanna meet for coffee? And then we sit and talk.

Debra Coleman [00:04:59]:
This is exactly an a prime example of a conversation I would literally have with you. And I hope that I'm able to do that with some of you, in the coming months and years. That would be amazing. But, anyway so late last year, mid to late okay. We'll just say the fall. Just call it even. We'll say the fall. My current employer issued a return to office mandate.

Debra Coleman [00:05:21]:
I know. I know. I know. They're out there. They're famous. You know? For those of you who may or may not know, I work for an online university. I've been in higher education for over twenty years. Recently pivoted to an online university in 2021 when I realized that, working from home is it for me.

Debra Coleman [00:05:37]:
Like, that's that's my jam. And I was blessed to find a fantastic position with an online university, as an executive assistant. So it was like the best of both worlds. And I have had an amazing ride. It has been incredible. The university I'm with, they do amazing things for their students. It's such a wonderful option especially for working adults who, are adulting. Right? And also we're trying to pursue a degree.

Debra Coleman [00:06:01]:
It's a fantastic option and so I'm very proud to be associated with a university that believes in in providing education and, and, providing a a pathway to higher education pursuits for those who seek it. So it's been wonderful, and I can't even I can't even begin to describe. I'm a get I'll get a little worked up if I do. The amazing team that I have been honored to work a side by side with, the VP and the senior director, specifically Darren and Kim. You guys just you guys knocked my socks off. You're amazing. And, I couldn't have asked for better, honestly. But, so sadly, for me, it's not sad news to the university because they're doing what they feel is best.

Debra Coleman [00:06:42]:
Right? Return to office, whatever. You know? No hate. No shade. That's that's their decision. That's fine. But they are located in Utah, and there is no way that Paul and I are even, like, contemplating moving to Utah. We're in Nevada, transplanted from California, transplanted from Texas. So moving to Utah just isn't in our life plan.

Debra Coleman [00:07:00]:
So, I knew that I was on the shortlist, so to speak, because, you know, RTO, to just put a red bow around it, you either, you know, you it's either yes or no. Either you're gonna relocate or you're not. And so, finally, we got so that came out. Sorry. That came out late last year. And, it came out for the senior directors and above. Right? And so I said to myself, well, the the the staff members haven't received that memo yet, but I predict we'll receive something similar in the spring of twenty twenty five. And guess what? We did.

Debra Coleman [00:07:34]:
We just received it this week. Can I call it or what? I am so, like I'm, like, low key proud of myself. I totally called that. Anyway, so the letter came, and, of course, you know, my answer is still no. And so I do have a due date, an employment due date with the university, sadly, that that I don't know I know when the final date will be. It's in 2026, mid '20 '20 '6. But just to be honest with you, I'm not sure how much longer I will last into in to see that date. You know, I may see that date or I may not.

Debra Coleman [00:08:07]:
It's still unknown, but the sad part is I will be I will be leaving. So this is, by all definitions, like, I don't know, a twelve month, eighteen month notice, I guess. So that was that kind of all kinda came about late last year and early this year. So that's kinda been hanging over my head. When you know I mean, I understand that you know, I'm I'm very grateful that I at least got some sort of notice. Like, I saw this was coming. So at least, you know, Paul and I were able to prepare, you know, just mentally, emotionally, financially, just kinda prepare for this day. And now that we've gotten the official word, it's like, okay.

Debra Coleman [00:08:42]:
That's alright. You know, we've made we've made arrangements and adjustments, and we're doing our thing. And so when the when the memo came finally came out this week, it was like, it's almost like a sigh of relief. Like, okay. I knew it was coming. It's just now that it's here, now we can actually, like now that's something to work with, right, rather than just the unknown. Because I absolutely believe in this definition of fear. I know fear has very many definitions, but this is a definition that I believe in, which is fear stands for false evidence appearing real.

Debra Coleman [00:09:12]:
So I thought that's a pretty I like that definition, false evidence appearing real. So, now that false evidence is real, and that's something we can work with. So that's where we're at with that. So we're, kind of a bummer. But because I saw that coming, I kinda hinted at this in past episodes at solo episodes that I did, but I decided to start my own company, my own, I guess, for lack of a better word, like, virtual assistance company, like, service my I opened up my own business. How's that? And, still you know, just providing, like, administrative and operational support to businesses who don't necessarily wanna hire, you know, an, an administrative support or or or operational support, but they love the idea of just contracting out. Right? So, fast forward, I now have, two clients. I'm very excited.

Debra Coleman [00:10:01]:
It's it's really neat to see that. And you know what? On another show, I will go into more of my journey starting up my own company because I'm sure I know for me when I looked into this and I did a rabbit hole I mean, honestly, friends, I it took me, like, two weekends, and I just did a complete rabbit hole on what it means to start your own business, how to do it, this type of business, like a a virtual assistant type support business, you know, like, anyway, so that's a whole thing. It's a whole thing. It's good, and it's it's fun. And I and I really am enjoying it. I'm I have learned so much, and I really am am am grateful that I can keep doing administrative support work because that's that's my jam. But it's been really, like, interesting to support different in different ways. You know, when you have, like, different people you're working for and it's not the same organization, it's really an eye opener to learn, like, different processes, different workflows, different, ways businesses are run, different needs.

Debra Coleman [00:10:57]:
It's it's just it's been amazing. It's been an amazing journey, and I'm very excited about that. So that started and, it's very so very successful in my mind so far. So that so I feel a little bit better that I have something maybe to fall back on Because Paul's brilliant advice was, why don't you start something like that? You've and to be fair, I've always talked about it. I've always talked about, like, oh my god. I would love to become like a VA. I would love to be like, run my own show, but I'm just not brave enough to jump in the deep end. But he said, since you got this pseudo notice, you know, or you know the notice is coming, because we were talking about this well before 2025.

Debra Coleman [00:11:34]:
We were talking about this late twenty twenty four in the fall. When the senior directors got their notice, he's like, you know yours is gonna be coming early twenty twenty five. So why don't you think while you have, you know, a a steady paycheck coming in, why don't you think about starting your your a side business, like a part time work, you know, something you can do nights and weekends, like, when you're not working, for your employer. Right? So something part time after hours, that sort of thing. I'm like, that's a great idea. You know? Now is the time to do it, not when I'm, you know, getting receiving my last paycheck, you know, going, oh, now I think I'll start a business. You know? And, I I know I am coming from a place of privilege because Paul has a full time job. So we are a dual income, family.

Debra Coleman [00:12:17]:
Right? So that that does help. I'm not gonna lie. Okay? But at the same time, we're not rich either. You know? We have we watch every penny, and we have budgets and all that fun stuff. Right? Look, I don't buy things that aren't on sale. You know what I mean? So, I mean, I will splurge occasionally. I mean, groceries. Right? But it's like, hey.

Debra Coleman [00:12:35]:
You know? So, anyway, I took his advice. I'm like, good advice. Because that way, if it doesn't work, if for any reason, you know, the VA business, you know, failed, which is fine too. You know? I mean, it would be disappointing and sad, but that happens. I still, at least for the time being, you know, still am employed somewhere. So it was a it was a safe time to start something like this. And so so far so good. You know? Knock on wood.

Debra Coleman [00:12:57]:
All the things, I feel really, very lucky and honored to be working with the clients that I have, and, we'll see where it goes. Like I said, I'll do a follow-up show, to get more into this. If you're interested in how I started and and give you a little, like, preview, if you are interested, I'm happy to kinda talk through it with you. So definitely reach out to me. Link to the have a seat website in the show notes. There's a contact me link at the top of the page. Feel free to use that, and I'm happy to share with you, you know, my my VA journey, because yeah. It I'm still on it.

Debra Coleman [00:13:31]:
So I'm not an expert by any means. Right? I'm still learning. Literally, I can tell you, like, almost every week, I'm learning something new about running this business, and it's I love it. I love it. So, and I can share with you. Ultimately, my goal is to I mean, I would love to just keep this going for as long as possible. You know? I'm open to becoming, like, a w two employee again. Absolutely.

Debra Coleman [00:13:54]:
You know? I would never turn down a fantastic opportunity if the stars aligned, and, you know, I would absolutely accept another position with another organization. But the world as it is right now, you know, it's a saying came to mind, but I won't say it because it's it's not g rated. But, anyway, for those of you who know, you know, it's you know what? Hard for a you know what out in the world. So, Yeah. So it, anyway, I forgot where I was going with that. But yeah. So I would be open to definitely accepting another position with another organization. And if it was still in nonprofit, I would love it even more.

Debra Coleman [00:14:34]:
But if and when that should ever happen, at least I know I have this business that I started and will and I'm really enjoying so far watching it grow and watching myself grow in the process. So, anyway, March musings. Again, I didn't want this to be long. I just kinda wanted to share with you something. These mini casts are also just stuff that is top of mind for me and what's going on. Also, not so fun. I'll share with you something that's not so fun is that, recently Paul and I had an attempted break in in our house. Thank God we weren't home but our little Shih Tzu Jack was and they attempted to come in through the front door like they basically kicked in our front door.

Debra Coleman [00:15:13]:
And yeah scary stuff and I saw all this happening live while I was in an elevator in between floors I was in a building and I sent Paul the first video because the this this person was looking at our front window and then he came back and tried to break into the front door and tried to, like, kick his way in. And I'm seeing all this happening. I am stuck between floors in an elevator watching somebody literally break into our house. You know, I'm not still in the car where I can, like, hang, you know, hang a UE and just zip back home like the devil. Right? But, it it I've never felt so helpless in my life and scared. Luckily, he did not gain entry. He did not even cross the threshold. He just kicked in the door and then bolted.

Debra Coleman [00:15:52]:
So I'm sure there's more to that story, but because Jack was there barking his ass off, and at and also the first video of him just kinda casing the joint, we called my neighbor right away. And so our neighbor was, I think, on his way down the street when he kicked in the door. And then when so I think between the neighbor on like, like, walking towards the house and Jack barking, he just bolted. Thank god. But the front door was wide open, and Jack didn't leave. I know many of you who have fur babies are probably like, what? No. He didn't. He stayed in the hallway.

Debra Coleman [00:16:24]:
He just like, bark, bark, bark, bark. Like, you know, those old cartoons where the little dog is barking, and he's, like, actually jumping up and down because he's barking so hard. That that was Jack. And my neighbor said he could see him through the open front door just, like, bark, bark, bark. But, like, he just was. So we called our that we had so many neighbors that we were able to call. Thank God that were just like and I called the police. So Paul was calling neighbors, and I was calling police.

Debra Coleman [00:16:45]:
We were on two different phones making these phone calls. And so by the time we got back to the house, but, fifteen minutes later, we both got there as fast as we could. We had this this camp of people in front of our house. We had neighbors and police and just the whole thing. So it was so and one of the things that policemen said when, actually, excuse me, police person. It was a policewoman. She was amazing. She said, you know what? One good thing you have on your side, you and your husband had on your side is this network right here, this network of neighbors that you're able to call in the heat of the moment to back you up.

Debra Coleman [00:17:16]:
And we so if you are in a neighborhood situation, whether it's standalone houses townhomes apartments whatever it is get to know your neighbors or one or two that you trust because when you need something like that hopefully you won't but it really does make a difference is what the policewoman said. So, yeah, kinda scary. So that's the roller coaster. That's the roller coaster I'm talking about. Right? It's like, oh, high, low, high, low, high, low, high, low. Right? And that's what I mean by life is messy. It's it's not pretty, you know. So, anyway, I just wanted to share with you because we're friends, and this is what we do.

Debra Coleman [00:17:54]:
So I will leave you with that. I know I'm I'm kinda leaving you on a weird note with a weird story, but I I should've told that first and then ended on a high note. But it is a high note because we're safe. We're okay. Jack is okay. Nothing was taken. Nothing was stolen. All is well.

Debra Coleman [00:18:10]:
It's just, you know, that uncomfortable weird kind of we've been violated. You know, our privacy has been violated. Our safety has been violated feeling that we're violated feeling that we're working through, but we'll get there, and we'll be back to normal. But, the good thing is we're all okay. And, so that's what's important and that's what we focused on. So, anyway, alright, friend. Well, I'll let you go. I know I've tried to keep these short.

Debra Coleman [00:18:31]:
So, as always, you know the drill. But, again, I'll repeat the have a seat website link in the show notes. Feel free to access that where you will find more episodes just like this, solo episodes of various topics. And but we even more importantly, though, you will find amazing interviews and conversations with all the wonderful women that I have had the absolute pleasure of speaking with. And my show is not one that you need to listen in any sort of order. So feel free to peruse the catalog of shows and find one that might, jump out at you and take a listen. But, until then, thank you so much for tuning in this week. And, you know the drill.

Debra Coleman [00:19:09]:
Right? Stay safe. Really stay safe. Be well. And remember, keep having those conversations. Okay, friend. Until next week.